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11-21-24 06:11 PM
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Xeogaming Forums - Debate Shrine - Sex | |
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User Post
Makura









Since: 01-22-05
From: The restaurant at the end of the universe....

Since last post: 5886 days
Last activity: 5152 days
Posted on 03-22-07 11:23 AM Link | Quote
Let's talk about sex. I started this because of the age group on the board. I think that it's a valid topic that kids are sometimes afraid to talk about. So I'll ask questions and stuff periodically to draw debates and topics.

How important is sex in a relationship?
geeogree

Ninji








Since: 10-19-04

Since last post: 5174 days
Last activity: 267 days
Posted on 03-22-07 02:25 PM Link | Quote
sex is only as important to a relationship as it is to each individual in the relationship.

which is usually why people fight about sex. One partner wants it to occur more frequently or more creatively etc while the other doesn't.

it's different with every couple and there is no way to judge what is the right amount.
Belial

Bazu








Since: 01-29-05
From: New Zealand

Since last post: 4364 days
Last activity: 3978 days
Posted on 03-22-07 02:55 PM Link | Quote
I can't explain my feelings about it. I don't see what love has to do with sex. I have loved someone with all my heart, but never really felt like I needed to have sex with him. I did have sex of course, but there was no love in it. I could care less if I ever had sex again. I'm not a physical person. I prefer to have my space.

For most people I find that sex is really important. For me it isn't. Sex is not love. It is lust. That is all I can say.
geeogree

Ninji








Since: 10-19-04

Since last post: 5174 days
Last activity: 267 days
Posted on 03-22-07 03:00 PM Link | Quote
Originally posted by Belial
Sex is not love. It is lust.


I disagree. It can be lust, but not in every case.
Belial

Bazu








Since: 01-29-05
From: New Zealand

Since last post: 4364 days
Last activity: 3978 days
Posted on 03-22-07 04:11 PM Link | Quote
Originally posted by geeogree
Originally posted by Belial
Sex is not love. It is lust.


I disagree. It can be lust, but not in every case.


But that's the thing, I can not connect sex and love like that. I don't know why I can't, either. Maybe I need therapy in the department or something.
Makura









Since: 01-22-05
From: The restaurant at the end of the universe....

Since last post: 5886 days
Last activity: 5152 days
Posted on 03-22-07 11:57 PM Link | Quote
Well Belial, if you don't mind me asking, do you enjoy sex?

I honestly could never have sex with anyone that I didn't absolutely love. It's such a deep emotional spiritual thing for me
Belial

Bazu








Since: 01-29-05
From: New Zealand

Since last post: 4364 days
Last activity: 3978 days
Posted on 03-23-07 01:41 PM Link | Quote
Originally posted by Makura
Well Belial, if you don't mind me asking, do you enjoy sex?


I do enjoy it. That's one of the weird aspects of my issue. I enjoy having it, but not particularly with someone I'm in a relationship with.
Siobhan.

Red Paragoomba








Since: 02-15-07
From: Boston

Since last post: 6263 days
Last activity: 5303 days
Posted on 03-23-07 02:33 PM Link | Quote
Sex (and orgasm) with the person you love is one of the most unique and magical gifts that you can give to your beloved. I personally don't think I would enjoy sex with someone that I don't love. For me, while sex is about the physical pleasure, there is a huge emotional connection. Usually the best part of sex is lying with your partner and enjoying the orgasm, aka pillowtalk or whatever. Although I love John and if he didn't want to have sex with me I wouldn't find it necessary, I enjoy it very much and it's pretty important to me in our relationship now. When I had sex for the first time it wasn't a big deal in a negative way, as most people say it would be for a young(ish) teenager. I think people make too much of a huge deal of sex in a negative light. I think that if you have sex with someone you love it is an amazing and unique experience that can just create more magic and memories for a relationship, and if you choose to have sexual intercourse casually (but safely) it can gratify your natural human needs. Diseases and such can be spread a number of ways, it's kind of sad that we label people (usually young people) that have sex a lot as sluts and bad people, because it's something that's so pleasurable and entertaining that well you don't need anything but your body for. I've been considered "that kind of girl" by so many people and looked down upon just because I'm open to talking about sex and I support people that are having sex and enjoying it, even if it's premarital, as long as they are educated about it. But whatever, I probably sound pretentious or something haha. I enjoy sex and it's important in my relationship but so is pretty much everything else, including the friendship aspect I have, the humor, the compassion, the loyalty and devotion. etc.
Elara

Divine Mamkute
Dark Elf Goddess
Chaos Imp
Penguins Fan

Ms. Invisable








Since: 08-15-04
From: Ferelden

Since last post: 99 days
Last activity: 99 days
Posted on 03-24-07 09:36 PM Link | Quote
I agree that it does have a more magical feel when it is with someone that you love, though regardless for me it has to be someone that I trust.

As for the original question... it's kinda important, but not some direly needed thing.
Makura









Since: 01-22-05
From: The restaurant at the end of the universe....

Since last post: 5886 days
Last activity: 5152 days
Posted on 03-26-07 02:28 AM Link | Quote
How old is acceptable for losing one's virginity? How old were you?

I was 15. I'd known the person for a year and a half, but we'd only been dating for 2 months. I think that 15 is young, but I consider myself an acception. I think it depends on the person, but idealy 17 is a good age for teens.
Jobes

Car Joe








Since: 02-01-05
From: Bensalem

Since last post: 6008 days
Last activity: 5008 days
Posted on 03-26-07 03:10 AM Link | Quote
Idealy 17 is a good age but in reality we have kids losing there virginity at the ages for 12 and even younger. I lost my virginity when I was 15. Like Makura said it all depends on the person you are going to have sex with and yourself. I lost my virginity to a girl that I knew for over a year we were dating for a couple of months. I love sex. Sex is great to have but I only have sex with the person I am in a serious relationship with. Someone might have sex on the first night and no I am not talking about the hookers.
Siobhan.

Red Paragoomba








Since: 02-15-07
From: Boston

Since last post: 6263 days
Last activity: 5303 days
Posted on 03-26-07 03:10 AM Link | Quote
Originally posted by Makura
How old is acceptable for losing one's virginity? How old were you?

I was 15. I'd known the person for a year and a half, but we'd only been dating for 2 months. I think that 15 is young, but I consider myself an acception. I think it depends on the person, but idealy 17 is a good age for teens.



I was 15, nearing 16. Frankly, I'm not concerned with setting an age limit for others. I was ready and I don't regret it at all, nor do I think I was too young or whatever. I think the reason you and most people think 15 is too young is because lots of teenagers are ignorant assholes who fuck around without caring, and not just with stuff like this, with alcohol and drug abuse and what not as well. Teenagers have given themselves a bad rep.
Jobes

Car Joe








Since: 02-01-05
From: Bensalem

Since last post: 6008 days
Last activity: 5008 days
Posted on 03-26-07 03:13 AM Link | Quote
Teenagers have given themselves a bad rap. I am not saying 15 is young 10 years is young. When I was 10 I was worried about playing football for my team and girls had cuddies.
Elara

Divine Mamkute
Dark Elf Goddess
Chaos Imp
Penguins Fan

Ms. Invisable








Since: 08-15-04
From: Ferelden

Since last post: 99 days
Last activity: 99 days
Posted on 03-26-07 03:59 PM Link | Quote
Cooties, Jobes.

I was 14, and I think that it was too young. I wasn't really ready, amongst other things.16 I think is more acceptable personally.
Bitmap

#1 Enhancement Shaman US Ravenholdt








Since: 09-05-04
From: His Laughin' Place

Since last post: 4556 days
Last activity: 4550 days
Posted on 03-26-07 04:19 PM Link | Quote
Originally posted by Makura
How old is acceptable for losing one's virginity? How old were you?



Does oral Sex count on loosing your virginity? because I lost that type...this year.

Penetration is a no no as of yet...so im still a virgin on that part.

But I feel that the perfect age of having sex is when you are truely ready...I mean, im not ready for it yet, and Im sure as hell I dont want to have any accidents...

so there are other ways...
Makura









Since: 01-22-05
From: The restaurant at the end of the universe....

Since last post: 5886 days
Last activity: 5152 days
Posted on 03-26-07 05:21 PM Link | Quote
That was gonna be my next topic, Mr Club. Oral sex is I think very healthy for people that aren't ready to give it up and don't have access to trustworthy birthcontrol. However I think you're still considered a virgin which isn't a bad thing at all and you don't seem ashamed of it.

I gave a recieved oral sex before I lost my virginity just because it was the safest way. If you really love someone I think ti's important to express it physically.
Jobes

Car Joe








Since: 02-01-05
From: Bensalem

Since last post: 6008 days
Last activity: 5008 days
Posted on 03-26-07 05:58 PM Link | Quote
If you give or receive oral sex you are still a virgin but there is no shame to being a virgin. Like most people I received oral because it was safe and we werent ready to have sex yet.
Belial

Bazu








Since: 01-29-05
From: New Zealand

Since last post: 4364 days
Last activity: 3978 days
Posted on 03-26-07 07:17 PM Link | Quote
Wow, I feel kinda... awkward. I didn't lose anything until I was 18. I was as "ready" as you can get for it... I hadn't known the guy more than a month... and he was a real douche about things later. I don't really care about him though.

I lost my virginity before I ever gave or received oral.
Siobhan.

Red Paragoomba








Since: 02-15-07
From: Boston

Since last post: 6263 days
Last activity: 5303 days
Posted on 03-26-07 07:26 PM Link | Quote
Although oral sex doesn't count as losing your virginity in our society, oral sex is still SEX, and thanks to Mr. Clinton, plenty of teenagers consider it something far from sex. I don't get why. It still comes with lots of risk for disease, although there is no penetration or ability to impregnate (unless the sperm travels.) I think that couples that are waiting for marriage but "do everything but", including oral sex, are stupid. That isn't remaining pure for marriage at all, it's still a type of sex, and if your beliefs are that intercourse isn't okay but oral sex is, you're just looking to make exceptions.

I think people make too much of a damn big deal about sex. Sex is just as natural as eating, sleeping, and taking a shit. Why the hell do we even need a label for if someone has had sex or not. It's stupid. The idea of sex before marriage being bad only EXISTS because of the belief that marriage is only for procreation, and therefore people must marry to procreate, and can't do so otherwise. It didn't matter who loved who. Our views on sex are all distorted because of society falling under a spell. tries not to bring religion into this.
nuit

Goomba








Since: 03-04-07

Since last post: 5399 days
Last activity: 4085 days
Posted on 03-31-07 03:47 PM Link | Quote
Love and sex have nothing to do with eachother. Two people can love one another without ever having sex. Having someone's dick in you doesn't mean you love them, or vise versa.
Trust... a very poor gauge and excuse.... we can trust the wrong people.
The bigger question is, why do we have to justify wanting to fuck? It's built into us.
The only answer I can guess at is because: people are more worried about looking like sluts, as opposed to acting like sluts.
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