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| Xeogaming Forums - - Posts by venomouslobster |
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venomouslobster Scarfy          Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days |
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| thats why i love you makura...you get me.
(in the i want to preside over your wedding way not the be IN the wedding, get drunk and fall asleep with my hand down the bridesmaids dress kinda way) anywho in case you handnt noticed i tend to write things so that I understand them not so you can....there is no "flow", i dont believe in any grammer I dont enjoy, and since you cant hear my tone of voice i use caps and words alot of people are new to....but thats ok thats just how I roll, playa! now bring me a whore.....one that can SING!!! |
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venomouslobster Scarfy Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days |
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| *as her eyes hit the rock all the doves explode in a torrential rain of acid, causing the forest trees to wither, and melt. A godesses ears might pick up the 32 clinking noises as the little unpolymorphed "Holy Pendants of Jade" fall to earth*
(2 out of 10 contingencied spells activated and expended: #1 Contingency: a dove was brought lower than 1hp Effect: polymorphed into elf #2 Contingency: Jade looked directly at my polymorphed form Effect: spell trigger with 3 keyed spells: mass explode(acid) Polymorph( self) elemental shield (acid, in the form of an umbrella) *zvidurix appears before you, his sickly white skin and pale thin leather robes standing out starkly against the dark night. he holds up an umbrella that seems to be composed out of the same white leathery material as his robes, upon which the acid hisses and steams but does not eat through which cannot be said for the surrounding area....* "i did" |
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venomouslobster Scarfy Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days |
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| i LOVED that film, great characters, each person now has a goal.....so on with the mocking!
By Captain Lobster #1 Every character aboard the Flying dutchman looked absolutley delicious....i would attack with cannon and then subsequently with butter and garlic! #2 Davy jones is a scottish squid.....yep....a squid....this means only one horiffying truth: now the slash fanfics will have tentacle rape.....sweet blue jebus no! #3 undead monkey! #4 barbosa comes back in the end!!!!!................AS BARBOSA THE WHITE! #5 will turner is the ONLY character (including whats her face) that has nice teeth #6 elizabeth wants jacks wang.....to be devoured by squid #7 will is still a douche |
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venomouslobster Scarfy Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days |
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| you know....wesley snipes doesnt play blade in the comic book....i mean would you rather that all people playing batman attemt to emulate adam west? | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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venomouslobster Scarfy Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days |
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| i went to church, and I'm discordian. I had fun. view it as a chance to learn about a group of people. the more you know about a religion the less they will be able to try to convert you when you can point out all the discrepencies in the text they base their faith on. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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venomouslobster |
Scarfy Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days
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why non-belivers (terrorists) go to hell (disneyland)
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non christians go to hell because christians say so thats it (also it is generally accepted by most christian scholars and theologians that hell is simply being in the abscence of god, so if you think about it if you are not christian you dont have to worry about it to begin with) Dante Alligheri summed up the popular belief that when a {A) good man who didn't accept the jesus, B) unbaptized child or unborn child C) fellow who didnt know god existed but was nice } died they would go to "limbo" the first plane of hell, a vaguely boring but idyllic place where ancient greek philosiphers taught their wistom to a horde of unbaptized babies and unwashed savages. But i think it will all come as a relief to christians and heathens (evil devil worshiping sodomites) that the afterlife does exist, and it is all inclusive and consists largley of group sex and wine-drinking....
venomouslobster |
Scarfy Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days
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Hobgoblin!
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I am puck, robin godfellow, will o' the wisp,that merry wander of the night, by any name a rogue! I am a laughsome rake in search of a good time at any cost. Angst betide the foolish or greedy dupe made a coxcomb by my apeish japes and pranks, likley to as not return to his home with no shirt nor trews and a pouch filled with gold (leaves and dirt)! give me your hands if we be friends and robin shall restore amends! (i likest not this quiz! they did forsake myself and all my kind! a bare niggling mention of the peoples of the seelie court and did get the names wrong on a great many! i had to pen my own entry!)
venomouslobster |
Scarfy Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days
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interesting note i just found out while reasearching puck
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evidently one of the early beliefs of anglic christians (not anglicans i mean irish scottish and english peoples who were christian) was that the souls of dead heathens who were too good for hell were allowed to live on as faeries
venomouslobster |
Scarfy Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days
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People that the Lobster deems worthy of being beaten with unwashed pooper scoopers and hung upsidedown in a tepid vat of badger afterbirth until dead
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- people in the electrical company that shut down power plants to justify charging you more money during summer when the plants arent even supplying your area and the yeast cells in your beer that you are trying to make all die because your family cant afford to keep the AC on all day - those fools who on their cellphones on the midnight showing of a movie and are right next to you they wait in line 2 hours to get in, pay 9 moneys, wait another 40 minutes for the movie to start and then start yammering at their friend who is still at home DESCRIBING THE FILM!!!!.....these are people who must face the BRICK OF SILENCE - beer companies that sell their pale yellowish fizzy vaguely beerish swill to stupid people with no taste at my golf course - the golfers who get wasted out of their minds due to drinking 20 of these horrible cans of sweaty ballsack macrobrew (at 3.5% alchohol they NEED 20) and then get the carts stuck in the mud or drive into the fucking lake where i have to go push them out, and throw away the dozens of beer cans they leave behind cause no they dont clean them out of the carts..... - anyone who asks me while i am patrolling to go see the alligator which the media have dubbed "reggie".....sure i will take time out of my schedule in order to ferry your dumb ass out to the other side of the golf course so you can stare at the patch of dirt that an alligator inhabited six months ago.... -whoever called the alligator "reggie" to begin with .....he is the mighty swamp dragon MZUNGU and dont you forget it! - people who drink smirnoff ice, bacardi twist or any of that candy flavored fizzy "malternative" crap. legal-drinking-age consumers with the undeveloped palates of teenagers are demanding more and more light, fruity and fizzy alcoholic drinks. Consumers who buy these soda-pop flavored malternatives are clearly newbies to alcohol and don't like the taste of alcohol --- they just want the effect. People have said to me (all of whom have been under 21) that they drink them because they "like the taste" and i wonder why they just dont drink sprite?....cause they just want to be drunk...if you want to drink you should at become accostumed to the taste of alchohol otherwise it is like lying to yourself......TO THE AFTERBIRTH VATS WITH YOU ALL honorable mention: anyone who uses the word "noob" or any derivative therof, it is an act of exclusion even in its most harmless sense (Last edited by venomouslobster on 07-12-06 07:37 AM)
venomouslobster |
Scarfy Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days
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breasts are nice and all...idealy....though, i have seen some terrible ponderous horrible breasts in my time and heard about even worse ones.
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large, high, firm breasts have always denoted fertility just like hips surmounted by plump fine rounded ass meats. all these things speak to the little whispering voices of the past and generation, that which compells us to breed....our genes like boobs and thats all there is to it...and they are jiggly
venomouslobster |
Scarfy Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days
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*just as the first tendril makes contact with the hem of Zvidurix's robe, a small contained red sheen flickers around his body in a bubble about five feet wide and the tendrils crackle against it wrapping tightly around the cage*
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"well well....you have caught me with shrubbery...interesting, but you see i do not need a great deal of room in order to teach you a lesson, godling" * ensconced in the flickering kinetic barrier, zvidurix crushes somehing between his hands and with a tentacle, draws from his slick leather robes a rod. it is composed of ceramic like white material that is almost painful in its meticulous cleanlyness, slim, utterly cylindrical and exactly 50 centimeters in length, a perfect sphere of steel on one end a unneringly precise cube on the other. two of his tentacles swirl and issue forth a massive cone of white light in your direction*
venomouslobster |
Scarfy Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days
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i dont remember what website i found it on most recently, but i recall having seen like half a dozen references to it here and there in stories and books on faeries and ireland and such in the past
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but keep in mind it is a distinctly colloquial belief, you wont find christians in turkey saying this, it is mostly relagated to really old people in ireland (Last edited by venomouslobster on 07-15-06 09:10 AM)
venomouslobster |
Scarfy Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days
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forgive me for i know these as quadrapalegic (person without the use of their arms and legs) jokes....may whatever force that mitigates behavior in the universe punish me in the appropriate fashion...
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what do you call a quadrapelegic under some bushes? Russel! (rustle) what do you call a quadrapelegic in a pool? Bob! What do you call a quadrapelegic in front of your door? Matt! what do you call a quadrapelegic lying in a ditch being covered in dirt (i am going to burn for this) DOUG!! what do you call a Leper in a hot tub? Stu!
venomouslobster |
Scarfy Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days
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let me illustrate my opinion via inventive architectural euphemisms
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Big boss is a Golden palace on the himilayas, resplendant with flying buttresses and such chuck norris is a burning shack made of chicken shit and stuffed with severed dog asses
venomouslobster |
Scarfy Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days
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so has anybody ever heard of gloomy sunday and the legends behind it. it is mentioned in the flabbitybloo underneath the pic....sposed' to be a song of unfathomable woe....
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venomouslobster |
Scarfy Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days
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woe....unto....thee |
venomouslobster |
Scarfy Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days
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*at the impact of the sword on the red shining sphere sends the allhoon in the bubble hurtling off into the distance, richocheting of of trees and such until Zvid takes hold with levitation....looking a dazed and a bit bewildered*
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venomouslobster |
Scarfy Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days
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no damnit no not sunday bloody sunday, gloomy sunday. different song. bloody sunday is about a massacre in ireland, whereas gloomy sunday is the "hungarian suicide song"
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The Legend The Sceptics The Whole Shebang (Last edited by venomouslobster on 07-18-06 10:01 PM)
venomouslobster |
Scarfy Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6499 days Last activity: 5748 days
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one day i will find the home of the bastard who originally made that chuck norris website and bludgeon him to death with his own hastily and messily removed pelvic bone...and it will still not do justice for the overwhelming irrepairable damage he did to the internet at large
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| Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 |
| Xeogaming Forums - - Posts by venomouslobster |
