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| Xeogaming Forums - Interviews - Interview with GuardianOni! |
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Lord Vulkas Mormonus Vile High Xeodent of Xeomerica.          Since: 10-29-04 From: North Carolina, United States. World, Sol System, milky way Since last post: 94 days Last activity: 94 days |
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| "Well then, on that note, I present our special guest. Currently the undoubtedly craziest person on the board, someone who knows about poisonous lobsters...I present...Venomous Lobster!"
The hammer was pulled back, it would hopefully launch him into the crowd. Hopefully he would come along, be sent flying, then come back, and ask the question. |
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venomouslobster Scarfy  Since: 05-03-05 From: california (knows how to party) Since last post: 6327 days Last activity: 5576 days |
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| *within the depths, the Lobster hears the call...*
I HAVE BEEN SUMMONED!!! *the Lobster heaves his mighty carapace through a rend in the fabric of the Weave, stepping sidways into the Aether!* *Meanwhile the crowd grows restless muttering to themselves and checking their watches and searching for traps under their seats....time passes.....the audiance seems to have lost interest and are shifting nervously in their chairs* ... *Vulkar's left nostril begins to itch as suddenly an ENOURMOUS RED CLAW sticks out of it, followed shortly by the rest of a trully gargantuan Lobster as it heaves and claws it's way out of Vulkar's nose, flopping crustaceanly onto the stage* "excuse me i had no idea your nose was an inter-dimensional gate way....i would have knocked"*the Lobster says in the voice of James Mason* "well in any case i have been called to ask a question...so...what shall i ask..*clacks left pincer in bewonderment* ah! by jove i do believe i have it! *turns to Oni and grins happily in the manner of giant-fanged-diefic- venomous-lobster-kind* " Very well! using only the items within 100 yards of you, how many explosives and anti personel weapons could you make in twenty four hours assuming that your house were under seige by ninjas...and as a corralary how would you dispose of said ninjas?" * the hammer swings down suddenly catching the Lobster unawares and hurls his 30 foot bulk into the audiance crushing several patrons, the lobster, enraged, smashes down the lobby side wall and crashed throught the auditorium doors and escapes into the night crushing, and eating confused theatregoers.* |
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GuardianOni Shaman  Since: 09-07-04 From: The dark path Since last post: 5840 days Last activity: 5299 days |
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| Watching, Oni waves once the demon-lobster is half out of Vulcar's nose. As he asks his question Oni starts to laugh. And as his Lobster friend rampages out Oni again waves in good bye.
"Well, if my home was under attack by ninjas, what anti personal, or in this case anti Ninja device, and how many would I create. Using only the materials around me within a hundred yards." ((I'll assume that I am in my home and not in the theater.)) "Let me think... First you have to study your enemy. SO lets take a look at the ninja." He says pulling on a string and reviles a white screen. Then the lights go out and a slide show starts. The first slide an old Chinese painting "And the first known, and recognized ninja in history was a prince in china who dressed as a woman to get close to his target then slit his throat." The slide changes to a ninja in the classic black pajama look. "Then if you think of the common, or classic idea of a ninja you can see they are users of stealth and surprise. And not equipped for a face to face battle against a stronger opponents or more opponents." A slide shows weapons that a ninja would carry. "That is not to say that a ninja cannot fight, or that he/she is not a good combatant." A slide of ninjas engaged in combat, and then Naruto. Pulls on the string again and the screen rolls back up. "But that being said they rely on stealth, and surprise. So I would have to study what ways into my home is stealthy, and un protected. There are a few way in, which is quiet and at night would be the best bet." "Ok so I have a working understanding of my enemies, and an idea of the tactics that they would use. Now I would have to see what I have to use as a weapon making materials." Oni starts to walk around his home looking around. Coming back he sits back down. "Ok assuming the houses surrounding mine has similar amount of supplies, I have enough supplies to make a number of claymore like anti-personnel devises, as well as at least a two score of one use zip guns. As well as pressure sensitive plates. I would first plant the claymores in the ground around my home targeting all the entrances. I would have the claymores so that the have overlapping kill zones, but with different triggers. Then I would cut off the air flow to the rooms that I know I won't need, and gas them with a home brewed nerve gas. And then seal the rooms so that they were air tight. Once that was done I would take steel cable, and un thread it. And after stringing it along the floor; ceiling; and along several doorways, I would electrify it. Then I would trap a number of places where an attacker would hide, more than likely with explosives, and/or zip guns. A dumb trap is to set out a saran wrap roller with super glue, and set it on doors, so that any who would come into the door walks into it. Then noise makers is a must, so woppie cushions under rugs. Bells attached to doors, as well as zip guns." "Then once all this is done with I would do my ultimate plan. Take then numbers off my house and switch them with my neighbor's. Then I would dress up a neighbor or two as pirates. Knowing the traditional hate of ninjas against pirates to lure them over there. And once they enter to do battle with the false pirates I would blow the place up." |
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Lord Vulkas Mormonus Vile High Xeodent of Xeomerica. Since: 10-29-04 From: North Carolina, United States. World, Sol System, milky way Since last post: 94 days Last activity: 94 days |
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| "So you go to all that work, and then just have the ninjas attack someone else?" Vulkar shook his head wonderingly. "Anyway, I'd say that this was a decent interview, and it is now over. Thanks for listening all, and now I'll take advantage of my mod powers, and lock this, while sending it elsewhere." |
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