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11-23-24 11:14 PM
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Xeogaming Forums - Sunset Waterfall - Shunned | |
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Spartan

Metal battleaxe
Is back. Kind of.








Since: 11-15-04

Since last post: 90 days
Last activity: 79 days
Posted on 01-24-06 03:01 PM Link | Quote
My cousin just died this last weekend from a combination of Systic Fibrosis(sp?) and Diabetes.
I have seen this person every month for the past six years even though he lives in San Diego...No i find out IM NOT INVITED TO THE FUNERAL...WTF...We were best fucking friends...my parents can go and im fuckin stuck at home....DAMNIT...Why would they do this to me...this already fucked my weekend over...i couldnt think about anything else and wishing i had said more to him before he died...I cant think of any FUCKING reason for me to not be invited....

.................................................

If anyone has any advice or suggestions please share them...cause im pissed and sad at the same time../
Cairoi
This isn't about you and your loud mouth,
This is about me and my fucking beard.








Since: 08-29-04
From: PA

Since last post: 4850 days
Last activity: 4474 days
Posted on 01-24-06 04:29 PM Link | Quote
Well, the fact that they would bar ANYONE, let alone a relative from a funeral is more than wrong, I alone cannot change what has happened. But, here's my advice, and I hope it benefiets you.

You should try to ask them why you aren't invited with the most mature argument you can muster. Ask why they are excluding you from your cousin's funeral and if they can still fix it to get you in. Be sure to ask your mom/dad and parents of deceased, because their accounts may vary.

Whether or not you can make it to the funeral does not make you less of a cousin. While a funeral is a respected tradition for the dead, they cannot bar you from visiting his grave, or remembering him. Think of him with fond memories, and the memory of your cousin will never die. All that matters is the time you spent with him, and what it meant to you. Just because you missed his funeral does not mean you hate him. While I am apalled by your family's decision, I can only offer you my condolences and hopes that you remember your cousin back in the brighter days of life. I hope my words have helped.
Lord Vulkas Mormonus

Vile
High Xeodent of Xeomerica.








Since: 10-29-04
From: North Carolina, United States. World, Sol System, milky way

Since last post: 96 days
Last activity: 96 days
Posted on 01-24-06 07:32 PM Link | Quote
Realistically, I think there's been a misunderstanding.

Perhaps did they send it to your parents, only assuming that you would come with them? There could be no direct invitation, but still implied. I personally would reccomend you go anyway, and say that he was a good friend of yuors, and you want to go, regardless of their opinions.
Katana

Dark Wizard
\"She said tonight...come on come on collide...see what I fire feels like..I bet its just like heaven.\"








Since: 08-15-04
From: Philadelphia, P.A.

Since last post: 1556 days
Last activity: 1374 days
Posted on 01-24-06 08:05 PM Link | Quote
I'm inclined to agree with Vulkar. Perhaps there was a bit of a misunderstanding somewhere...or maybe they don't want younger people there? I mean...It's hard loosing someone...especially the death of young people I suppose. Maybe there is a really good reason why you weren't invited. Maybe they knew how close you are and like...I dunno...

And do you mind if I ask about the diabetes and how that was a factor? **is diabetic** :p I mean...yeah it's a serious disease and all but like...I dunno...
Bitmap

#1 Enhancement Shaman US Ravenholdt








Since: 09-05-04
From: His Laughin' Place

Since last post: 4558 days
Last activity: 4552 days
Posted on 01-24-06 08:08 PM Link | Quote
Originally posted by Katana

And do you mind if I ask about the diabetes and how that was a factor? **is diabetic** :p I mean...yeah it's a serious disease and all but like...I dunno...


That was bugging me as well...I just diddnt want to say anything....

I also agree with Cairoi, theres an explanation for everything that happens Spartian, I remember a couple of months ago you posted something about your sexuality, I was thinking that may be the matter of why you werent invited....

Dont let it get you down, im sure your cousin knows your trying to see him again...He knows your trying...

your in my prayers....
Elara

Divine Mamkute
Dark Elf Goddess
Chaos Imp
Penguins Fan

Ms. Invisable








Since: 08-15-04
From: Ferelden

Since last post: 102 days
Last activity: 102 days
Posted on 01-25-06 12:10 AM Link | Quote
I've never known people to be invited to a funeral, just notified that their is one. Unless they specifically said you couldn't be there I think there was misunderstanding like Vulkar said.
Makura









Since: 01-22-05
From: The restaurant at the end of the universe....

Since last post: 5889 days
Last activity: 5154 days
Posted on 01-25-06 09:45 AM Link | Quote
I think what you meant by "I wasn't invited." Is that your parents didn't want you to go. Call it a hunch but I think that's the case.

I can understand how you'd want to be there, but like Cairoi said, you don't have to be at the funeral to express how much you miss him. It hurts, believe me I know. I wish I could be there to help.

I say..keep on keepin' on. Accept what's happened, and you'll be fine.
Spartan

Metal battleaxe
Is back. Kind of.








Since: 11-15-04

Since last post: 90 days
Last activity: 79 days
Posted on 01-25-06 12:49 PM Link | Quote
when i say that i wasnt invited they specifically said i could not go...so now i am stuck at home or at a friends this weekend instead of paying my final respects...

my parents didnt even say that they would try to convince them to allow me to go...they were just like...Find somewere to go this weekend...


Thanks for the prayers...he found out he was diabetic about 2 months before he died...it was mainly systic fibrosis....he was going to turn 15 soon...i cant believe i cant go...
Makura









Since: 01-22-05
From: The restaurant at the end of the universe....

Since last post: 5889 days
Last activity: 5154 days
Posted on 01-25-06 04:59 PM Link | Quote
*huggles*

Well this weekend, or ever for that matter, if you need someone to talk to, I'm here. I'll give you my new number, just PM me.



(Last edited by Makura on 01-25-06 08:00 PM)
Rauni









Since: 08-14-04

Since last post: 1547 days
Last activity: 1547 days
Posted on 01-26-06 03:17 PM Link | Quote
Originally posted by Spartan #5150
Thanks for the prayers...he found out he was diabetic about 2 months before he died...it was mainly systic fibrosis....he was going to turn 15 soon...i cant believe i cant go...

Okay, do you even know about this about in the first place?

I somewhat doubt that your parent would say that to make sure you don't go. It is more likely to mean something else such as he got shot or something that causes him to mutate and die. Hey, even more reason to get involves with them.

Be a little stubborn and do yourself a favor, call the cousin's parent. Apologize to what happened to their son and ask them to see if YOU were invited as well. As part as I am concerned, you were only told from your parents, and not from your aunt and uncle.

Believes it or not, but I think the parents are likely to see that you are somewhat immature (possible), yet not ready to accept a real fact (possible), or even not strong enough to see your friend (possible). But maybe it is how they see the two of you or sometime to that extent.

I don't see the reason why would your parent say: "You can't go." without any specifically reason of why YOU SHOULDN'T go. It is one of those time where "why? how? and what?" question that can further give you a detail of a good explaination of why you SHOULD NOT go.
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