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01-22-21 11:22 PM
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Xeogaming Forums - Sunset Waterfall - Funerals.. Death. Bleh! | |
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Jin

Posting Pig
Not Dead








Since: 01-12-05
From: Nowhere

Since last post: 1282 days
Last activity: 1141 days
Posted on 03-18-05 07:00 PM Link | Quote
Allright, I've been kinda of 'gone' this week (not that many people noticed. I don't post all that much). And well.. My uncle died. I didn't think it would hit me very hard because on some level I didn't like him very much because of how much pain he's put my family through. And I thought of his pretty much fully self inflicted death as another chapter in that story. But I cried like a baby last night at the funeral home and today at the funeral.

This is the third funeral I've been to in the past couple weeks.

My great-grandmother on my mom's side.
My grandfather on my dad's side.
And now this one.

This was my mom's brother and both my grandparents are alive on her side of the family so you can only imagine how hard it is to lay your son in the ground.

He was also a divorced father of two. He hadn't seen his kids in about 6 years.. and I hadn't seen them in about that long either. And they showed up..

My grandfather had very mixed feelings about that. But that's to be expected I suppose.

But yeah, he was a very big pain pill user, and basically killed his body.

I was a pallbearer which means I had to carry to casket with my cousins and helped with various other tasks. But the single hardest thing for me was pretending I thought he was in 'heaven' because I don't believe in it. And most of my family doesn't know that.

I don't know.. I'm leaving out alot of big details but I don't want to ramble on for too long.

Thanks for reading. =
Xeoman

Ball and Chain Trooper
Administrator








Since: 08-14-04
From: 255

Since last post: 3 days
Last activity: 3 days
Posted on 03-18-05 08:39 PM Link | Quote
Yeah, Funerals ... aren't fun.

Honestly I've only been to one, when one of my old best friend's dad had fallen off of a ladder, and basically landed on his head. He made it through for a couple of weeks, but the damage was way too much to handle ...

I felt so bad for my friend. His mom didn't really have a job, so financial support would be hard ... he was a trouble maker kind of kid too, and well, he was only like 12, and to lose your own father at that age it's gotta be hard.

I went to the funeral with my mom. I almost cried, but I made it through, but the instant I saw my friend in the back room it felt like I was stabbed with a sword in my heart or something.

Yeah, I'm not a fan of Funerals either. =

But I do kind of believe the saying, as Passing for people come, it shouldn't be a time of sorrow, but a time of celebration for that persons life.
Pockets

Werewolf
pockets








Since: 10-20-04

Since last post: 3691 days
Last activity: 3208 days
Posted on 03-18-05 09:06 PM Link | Quote
I've never been to a funeral. My dad wanted me to go to my grandmas funeral but I didn't want to. I barely knew any of the people that were going to be there I didn't really care. It's kinda sad but I'm a rather apathetic person in that respect. There are very few peple in the world that I'd actually miss if they weren't around anymore.

But despite that. *picks up his beer* A toast Jin to those you've lost in the recent past. I believe a proper toast is a must to send them off. *takes a pull of Guiness*

And in case you're wondering I really do have a beer and I did toast them.
Pat Meth

Paratroopa








Since: 03-18-05
From: Keyes

Since last post: 5692 days
Last activity: 5687 days
Posted on 03-18-05 09:08 PM Link | Quote
I am a cold hearted bastard and have been to multiple funerals without dropping a tear. Granted, these people wren't my uncles, but still I'm relieved I haven't gone through that kind of pain yet.
Makura









Since: 01-22-05
From: The restaurant at the end of the universe....

Since last post: 4488 days
Last activity: 3753 days
Posted on 03-18-05 09:41 PM Link | Quote
*Hugs Jin* I'm sorry, Mike. I really am horrible with these sort of things. I'll be honest with you, I know it hurts. All I can say is I'm here if you need me.

I remember the first time I was at a funeral. I was completelty untouched by teh enitre thing until I looked over at my granmother and she was crying. I wasn't hurt by the death itse'f but to see that it hurt someone I loved hurt me.
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Posted on 03-19-05 05:57 AM Link | Quote
I've been to one, and that was my father's.

Not very pleasant, must I say.
Elara

Divine Mamkute
Dark Elf Goddess
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Ms. Invisable








Since: 08-15-04
From: Ferelden

Since last post: 8 days
Last activity: 8 days
Posted on 03-19-05 01:55 PM Link | Quote
*huggles Jin*

I am sorry for your loss and for you having to pretend to believe, I know how hard that is to do.

I've been to a lot of funerals, I had a lot of great uncles on my dad's side and they were dropping like flies for awhile... I think there might be one left, not sure. But yeah, I never cried at any of them because I didn't know them. It made me feel really sad, that I didn't care when I felt that I should, but that is life for you. I've only cried twice over a person's death: my grandmother (which took me 5 years to even cry about it), and my next door neighbor (because she died alone). Didn't get to go to grandma's funeral because it was in Missouri, but I went to my neighbors and I didn't cry then... I felt sad but I didn't cry. I suppose if someone really close to me died I would be balling like a baby, but I won't know until that happens.
Jin

Posting Pig
Not Dead








Since: 01-12-05
From: Nowhere

Since last post: 1282 days
Last activity: 1141 days
Posted on 03-19-05 05:24 PM Link | Quote
Thanks guys, I really appreciate the kind words and understanding on your part. =)

Death is never easy for the family involved but luckily my mom is taking it pretty well right now.
Xeios

You WANKER!








Since: 08-16-04

Since last post: 3675 days
Last activity: 1845 days
Posted on 03-19-05 05:38 PM Link | Quote
Wow, if that story doesn't slightly depress you, you aren't human.

*wonders why he isn't affected by story...*

Anyway. That stinks man, but then again, if you believe in karma, three good things will happen for each of thos deaths. Everything balances in threes.
Katana

Dark Wizard
\"She said tonight...come on come on collide...see what I fire feels like..I bet its just like heaven.\"








Since: 08-15-04
From: Philadelphia, P.A.

Since last post: 155 days
Last activity: 132 days
Posted on 03-20-05 07:59 AM Link | Quote
**hugs Jin** It's alright. It really is.

I've been to three funerals and didn't cry at any of them. First was my great-grandmother. I was 10 when she passed away and EXTREMELY close to her. But that's the thing...I was also equally obedient to her as well and her last words were "I'm 83 years old, and I'm dying surrounded by my family. I lived a good life and the way I'm dying has proven it. Don't be sad and don't cry." (Yes I remember those word for word being as I was there.) and you know what? I wasn't sad. I miss her greatly, but wasn't sad and I didn't cry. Even if I tried I couldn't have, and I believe that was because she said not to, and everyone says I was always automaticaly obedient to her even without realizing it.

Then it was my aunt Hannah's funeral and it was basically the same. Not as dynamic last words, and I wasn't even there when she passed on, but I love her greatly and I know she loved me and she was happy too.

The point of telling you that Jin, is that there are some good stories about death. The third death that occurred in my family was devastating and still to this day devastates me as though it just happened yesterday....expecially with a 5th year anniversary of it comming up April 2nd...but thinking about those two before him helps a bit because I don't go into a state of mind that it's all one big horrible thing that no good can come from or whatever. I'll admit that it only helps a little, but every little bit helps, I believe, and I like to share what helps me in hopes that it can help someone else.

**hugs** if you felt that you could, you can talk to me if you need someone to confide in or just rant to or whatever. People are there to help me and I'd like to return the favor by helping as well **glomps**
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