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Xeogaming Forums - Hyperbolic Time Chamber - This made me laugh a bit

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[quote=Savedox] BOOTY CALL CONTRACT

THIS AGREEMENT SHALL COVER THE FOLLOWING RULES AND PRINCIPLES:
1. There shall be NO sleeping over -- unless the sex is so good that it justifies a repeat performance in the morning.

2. We shall NOT meet in public except for dinner or drinks before the carnal events of the evening.

3Do NOT call me before 11:00 PM -- we don't have shit to talk about.

4. Under NO circumstances will there be any emotional discussions. These include questions like "Where are we heading with this?"; "Do you love me?"

5. We will NOT make plans in advance.

6. All gifts are gratefully accepted -- money is always the best gift.

7. NO talk of marriage shall ever be uttered -- however, dirty talk and screaming is encouraged.

8. We are NOT friends, just sex-buddies.

9. Calling out the wrong name during sex is OK.

10. Do NOT wear extra clothing -- I want it fast, easy, and I sure as hell don't want your ass leaving anything behind when you leave.

11. You will NOT fall asleep right after sex -- Consider my cry of "Oh, shit, I'm coming!" to be your cue to start gathering your things so you can get the fuck home.

12. Do NOT be offended if I don't ask if you enjoyed it -- I don't care.

13. If anyone asks who you are, the standard response will be: "Her roommate's boyfriend[girlfriend]."

14. You must confirm ALL visits. An unanswered phone call does not constitute confirmation.

15. If you don't want hot, wet, messy sex, do NOT come over.

16. Bring your own drinks -- I don't run a liquor store. Better yet, bring me a fifth of jack daniels.

By signing below, I agree to all of the above rules, regulations, stipulations, references, and inuendos. Furthermore, if I break this covenant, I will give great sex to the co-signer of this agreement during a drive of his/her choosing.

Booty Caller:
Date:
Booty Callee: [/quote]

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Savedox Posts: 570/1567	Originally posted by Makura Originally posted by Drizzt DoUrden Originally posted by Rogue And you've got a girlfriend. Oh... and that to Just kidding 0_0.... ....Bitch! runs to chase Elara with contract =P HA! I love you, Drizzt runs after Elara also, but instead of giving the contract to Elara, gives it to Makura I love you to
AlpoRaggins Posts: 454/793	I wonder if anyone out there actually does this... Oh yeah. Pimps. Let's all be pimps!
Makura Posts: 780/1555	Originally posted by Drizzt DoUrden Originally posted by Rogue And you've got a girlfriend. Oh... and that to Just kidding 0_0.... ....Bitch! runs to chase Elara with contract =P HA! I love you, Drizzt
Bitmap Posts: 723/7838	A brave 400 pound desperate dude who goes to lesbian chat-rooms...
WhiteRose Posts: 688/1461	lol. I can actually imagine someone carring copies of this contract with them when they go to clubs ro something. A very foolish (or brave) someone, but someone none the less.
Savedox Posts: 547/1567	Originally posted by Rogue And you've got a girlfriend. Oh... and that to Just kidding
Rogue Posts: 955/11918	Originally posted by Drizzt DoUrden Heh, I think I should go around school with that and see how many girls will sign up But I probobly wont cause I dont want to be kicked out for sexual harrasment And you've got a girlfriend.
Savedox Posts: 545/1567	Originally posted by Rogue That sounds about right.. I've seen contracts like that before. I've had guy friends that wanted to have a fuck-buddy relationship with me and have mentioned that's what they want. And yet, I end up with stalkers. Heh, I think I should go around school with that and see how many girls will sign up But I probobly wont cause I dont want to be kicked out for sexual harrasment
Rogue Posts: 946/11918	That sounds about right.. I've seen contracts like that before. I've had guy friends that wanted to have a fuck-buddy relationship with me and have mentioned that's what they want. And yet, I end up with stalkers.
Savedox Posts: 539/1567	Lol, I got it from a friend, not sure where she got it but yea,
Bitmap Posts: 699/7838	Where exactly did you find this? Did you make this up or something? :: Friend of mine peers over :: "Dude I need a contract like that" And for all those at harris County...that was Jeremy Armstrong <=^.^=>;;;
Savedox Posts: 537/1567	BOOTY CALL CONTRACT THIS AGREEMENT SHALL COVER THE FOLLOWING RULES AND PRINCIPLES: 1. There shall be NO sleeping over -- unless the sex is so good that it justifies a repeat performance in the morning. 2. We shall NOT meet in public except for dinner or drinks before the carnal events of the evening. 3Do NOT call me before 11:00 PM -- we don't have shit to talk about. 4. Under NO circumstances will there be any emotional discussions. These include questions like "Where are we heading with this?"; "Do you love me?" 5. We will NOT make plans in advance. 6. All gifts are gratefully accepted -- money is always the best gift. 7. NO talk of marriage shall ever be uttered -- however, dirty talk and screaming is encouraged. 8. We are NOT friends, just sex-buddies. 9. Calling out the wrong name during sex is OK. 10. Do NOT wear extra clothing -- I want it fast, easy, and I sure as hell don't want your ass leaving anything behind when you leave. 11. You will NOT fall asleep right after sex -- Consider my cry of "Oh, shit, I'm coming!" to be your cue to start gathering your things so you can get the fuck home. 12. Do NOT be offended if I don't ask if you enjoyed it -- I don't care. 13. If anyone asks who you are, the standard response will be: "Her roommate's boyfriend[girlfriend]." 14. You must confirm ALL visits. An unanswered phone call does not constitute confirmation. 15. If you don't want hot, wet, messy sex, do NOT come over. 16. Bring your own drinks -- I don't run a liquor store. Better yet, bring me a fifth of jack daniels. By signing below, I agree to all of the above rules, regulations, stipulations, references, and inuendos. Furthermore, if I break this covenant, I will give great sex to the co-signer of this agreement during a drive of his/her choosing. Booty Caller: Date: Booty Callee:

Xeogaming Forums - Hyperbolic Time Chamber - This made me laugh a bit

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