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New link in the top of page "IRC Chat". |
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| User | Post |
| Elara Posts: 698/9734 |
DAMN YOU POCKETS! I was gonna post that one. *grumbles*
There once was a man from Peru Who's limricks ended on line two Heh heh heh, that one's from Ren Faire as well. Goddess bless Sound & Fury! |
| Pockets Posts: 278/838 |
I just remembered one.
There once was a cowboy named Bruno. Who said fornication is one thing I do know. Ladies are fine, little boys are devine, but the llama is numero uno. |
| Makura Posts: 253/1555 |
There was a lady who triplets begat
Nat, Pat and Tat It was fun breeding But trouble feeding Cause she didn't have a tit for Tat. There was a young fellow named perkin Who was always jerkin his gherkin His father said perkin Stop jerkin your gherkin Your gherkins fer ferkin not jerkin There once was a pirate (the story relates) who liked to go dancing on roller skates. He fell on his cutlass which rendered him nutless and virtually useless on dates There once was a girl from New York whose vagina was plugged with a cork. To remove it she fingered, but still the cork lingered. So she got it out with a fork |
| venomouslobster Posts: 36/444 |
there once was a duke from Milan
who wrote poems that didnt quite scan when people asked why he'd simply reply I just like to fit as many words into the last line as i possibly can! |
| Cyro Xero Posts: 360/1778 |
Geez, you guys are very naughty posting these.¬_¬
I just made this up now, so it might not sound all too funny. A man wanted to try something new. His girlfriend said the same thing too. So he ate her upside down, with her face on the ground, but the guy tasted nothing but poo. Heh, not bad I guess. |
| Makura Posts: 243/1555 |
There once was a man from Peru,
who fell asleep in a canoe. He had dreams of venus, and put his hand on his penis. He woke up with a hand full of goo. |
| Elara Posts: 662/9734 |
How many versions of the Nantucket one are there?
Well, Pockets said all the ones that I know, so I got nothing. |
| Rogue Posts: 186/11918 |
I heard this one from a drag queen named Amber for a toast:
There once was a girl named Louise, Whose pubes went down to her knees. The crabs got together And knit her a sweater, So in winter her cunt wouldn't freeze. Just other limericks I know: There once was a whore from Nantucket She took my dick out to suck it I gave her a fifty. Boy she was nifty! And now I cum blood in a bucket. There once was a vampire named Mabel Whose periods were rather unstable. One night at full moon, She took out a spoon And drank herself under the table. There once was a fellow named Dave Who kept a dead whore in a cave. I have to admit She sure smelled like shit! But think of the money he saved. There was a man from Nantucket Whose cock was so long he could suck it. He said with a grin, Wiping spunk off his chin, 'If my ear were a cunt, I could fuck it.' |
| Pockets Posts: 273/838 |
Some of these I got from Ren Fair.
There once was a man from Kildare, Who was having his made on a stair, when the banister broke, and he doubled his stroke, and he finished her off in mid air. Said the tin man to Dorothy "My dear," "I would love to fuck you right here." "But I dare not," "For your runny wet twat," "would make my cock rusty I fear." This magical fellow Houdini, could do interesting tricks with his weiney when tied in a bow, he'd then make it go, up the butt of his helper miss queeney. There once was a man from Rangoon, whose farts could be heard from the moon, when you'd least expect them, they'd rip from his rectum, like the roar of an angry baboon. There once was a man from Legrass, whose balls were constructed of brass, when jangled together, they played stormy weather, and lighting shot out of his ass. A lesbian once in Kartoom, invited a Fairy up into her room, they spent the whole night, in a heck of a fight, as to which would do what and to whom. If I remember any others I'll post them at a later date. |
| venomouslobster Posts: 14/444 |
This is a thread for limericks of any sort (cause i like limericks) lemme start you off
A limerick packs laughs anatomical in a space that is quite economical but often, it seems they're so seldom clean but the clean ones so seldom are comical Their once was a girl who was chased by a man who kept pinching her waist so she rose with a clamour and picked up a hammer and beat the man into a paste! got any more...lets hear em! .....pockets this means you! |
