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| Rogue Posts: 8081/11918 |
Originally posted by Elara The majority of the idiocy seemed to come from people who used to work with the father-to-be (he's a cop for UCLA) or were like his cousins and second-cousins. In terms of the women putting their shitty babies on Michelle's new stuff and wanting to snoop around Michelle and Miguel's bedroom, I think those were Miguel's sisters. They're bitches who hate Michelle. In other news, someone created this. And I have no clue what was going through their head:  |
| Elara Posts: 7362/9736 |
Wow, that sounds like no baby shower I have ever seen... and my family is a bunch of fucking alcoholics.
In my little neck of the woods... people STILL don't read signs. EVER. Or coupons, or pin pad screens, or anything. Fucking humans! |
| Rogue Posts: 8080/11918 |
I've mentioned it in many threads, but I pretty much spent Friday through Monday at my boyfriend's aunt's house. Saturday was her baby shower. Soooo many idiots.
I'll start with the most glaring. Michelle's house has three sets of sliding screen doors. Three different ways to get to her backyard. Almost any given moment people were walking into one of them and popping them out. The worst one was this kid who popped each one out at least once, twice in some cases, heading headfirst into them. The two women he was with would feign like they were trying to fix the doors, but then just drop it and walk away. I hate to sound condescending, but I've never walked into a screen door in my life, let alone multiple times in one day and yet here was a group that was doing it round the clock. The next article of stupidity involved the food. The main entree at the shower was fried chicken. Once everyone had gotten their fill, there was the question of what to do with the remaining pieces as there were still boxes upon boxes left. There happened to be African-Americans at the party, and it seemed the people propositioned to take some home were almost always black. I don't know if it was intentional, but they certainly seemed to take it as such by the looks on their faces. Then there was the outright greed when people finally went, "Ya know, fuck it! I'ma take some stuff home." There were almost literally fights over the macaroni salad. When I finally got a crack at it, loaded some into a plastic bag, this woman threw a fit about it. I put my portion in the refrigerator only to find it GONE not an hour later. And that was the other thing, people were going about the leftovers like they were stealing and needed to make off in the night with 2-liters of soda and cases of beer, things that were provided by the hosts. Manners, in general, were in complete scarcity. People were leaving shit covered toilet paper (excrement face up) in the wicker waste baskets in the bathrooms, for fuck's sake. Then there were all the people who ignored the "DO NOT OPEN DOOR!! CAT!!" sign that was placed OVER THE DOORKNOB of the room in which Michelle's cat was being kept so he wouldn't freak out and run away with all the open doors around. Thankfully the cat never left the room. Then perhaps the most annoying were the women who were using the stuff in Michelle's new coming baby's room, changing their babies and leaving them in her crib while they snooped around Michelle's bedroom. I shit you not. It's just fucking inconsiderate. This is a fucking baby shower and you had people getting drunk and getting little kids to bring them more beer. |
| Cteno Posts: 2350/3416 |
Moving from soda to water and tea has made me feel 1000% healthier and I've lost a little over 100 pounds over the past year to show for it! The way that diet sodas work is that they use sugar substitutes to give the sweetness and when it touches your tongue, your brain tells your body to produce enzymes to break down the "sugar" that you just ate.
"Oh shit guys, we can't find the sugar! GET THIS BASTARD A CANDY BAR!! Or more of that soda!!" ...and that's why it makes you crave sweets afterward. The hundreds of extra calories and carbohydrates (without exercise) is what makes most people gain weight. Others have a godly metabolism, which I envy, and can eat just about anything and never gain an ounce. I'm looking at YOU, Yasu! Another thing that bugs me are people who go on fad diets, thinking short term. I'm sorry, but WRONG. A diet is a PERMANENT CHANGE TO YOUR FOOD INTAKE AND LIFESTYLE, end of discussion! If you magically lose 30 pounds from a brown smoothie, you're only going to gain it all back when you can't be bothered to continue taking it anymore. |
| SirAileron Posts: 101/125 |
Hoo, boy. Food misconceptions are ridiculous. That's up there with the girl who'd drink nothing but diet coke, because she was overweight. Listen, princess, it's nice that you want to lose weight, but drinking enough diet coke to drown a dolphin isn't going to help you no matter which way you look at it.
"But it's DIET!" Yeah, look, the only diet drink that doesn't have sugar is diet pepsi, and there's still plenty of other stuff that'll give you the chubbies. Lay of the soda, girl. |
| Rogue Posts: 7791/11918 |
My friend Meghan, who works at a Starbucks, witnessed some stupid today. Apparently this woman and her son came in and she bought him a bottle of apple juice along with her coffee.
The boy, looking at the bottle of juice, goes, "Mommy, what does 'organic' mean?" And she answered, "It means it's healthy for you." My friend then rolled her eyes, saying to herself, "That's right lady, dumping 35 grams of sugar down your child's throat is healthy."  |
| Katana Posts: 3264/3649 |
Wal*mart is the best place for people watching if you want to get some laughs.
We don't have a bag ban here, per se, but we have a lot of super markets that are like SUPER dirt cheap. Not the BEST, but if you get non-perishables, and things that don't REALLY matter...I love these stores. But THEY charge 10 cents for bags. But that was always because it was something that helped make them as inexpensive as they were in the first place. Cutting spending in some places. They're actually the first places I saw with the automatic light things when you go by the frozen stuff. Where the lights go out but they have motion sensors, and go back on when someone walks by. Good place for hippies. I have stupid moments all the time, actually. Like, when I'm making fun of people, but whatever it is I'm trying to say, comes out wrong...or when I have a REALLY good one, I type it out, and one of my keys stick, so I mistype something or whatever. I LOVE catching others in this sort of act as well. Like...you're busting on me, but you can't even spell **insert word here** This scenario is more or less one of those things that occur between friends, but whether the people are friends are not, still funny to see an insult backfire on the one dishing it out. |
| Elara Posts: 7043/9736 |
Yeah, that plastic bag ban is still stupid... but whatever. Ben suggests that maybe it was the psychological comfort of the bag making it "more secure" that tripped the guy out.
Honestly I am with you on this though. Tiny box, why do you need a bag? Also, is it just Wal*mart charging for paper or are other stores doing it too? Anywho, the main stupid that I've seen was at my old job where people would do really dumb things like ride their bikes into the arm bars at the parking booths or (my personal favorite), come down the hill on a skateboard, hit the bump in the sidewalk and fly forward to faceplant in the grass. Funniest thing I've ever seen in my life. But here... here I have seen mind-numbingly stupid. There is this bagger at my work, she's like 19, and she is by far the dumbest person I have ever met in my life. She vapidly stares into space, comes back to reality, and then asks really stupid things. So far the best has been showing me a receipt for a soda that she bought and at the bottom where it said "balance: $1.59", then asking me if that meant the balance left in her checking account. |
| Rogue Posts: 7644/11918 |
I often witness stupid in the wild, but then I tend to forget it since it's rarely worth remembering.
I just got back from Wal*Mart (yes, we went to Wal*Mart at 1 in the morning). I don't know what's up with the middle of the night. They'll have one check-stand open and it's got a long fucking line with loads of stupid waiting in it, each with a varying degree of idiotic drama. We get in line, pleased to see nothing on the conveyor belt, except for the fact that there were two people in line, both having a conversation. Eventually the first guy leaves, and the second finally turns to the checker to say he had a phone sent up. She looks into it and when she finally receives it, he starts asking her questions about it that she would not know: "Is that the old model or the new one? I bet it's the old model. Well I'll buy it anyway. Can you see how many are in stock? No? Well, fine then." Anyway, since Long Beach started this new law of making plastic bags illegal, the store we were at didn't have them. This REALLY upset the guy, as he continued to stand there, awkwardly right next to the card reader while I was trying to use it since the checker just rang up my order and I had to pay. All he bought was the cellphone, which came in a box about 7 inches by five inches by three inches. He tried to grab one of the paper bags and the clerk said, "They're 10 cents apiece, hon," to which he went, "REALLY!? That's just... that's just awful." This shit about plastic bags has been all over the news for weeks. It's to try to get people to just break down and either buy canvas bags or bring their own, and this will somehow save the world. He then walks off into the produce section and snags a bag from there to stuff his easily-carriable box in and walks out of the store with it like that. Walking as slow as could be in front of us the whole way. 
Well, it's not prize-winning stupid, but when you're standing in a Wal*Mart middle of the night simply to buy ice cream (and end up just getting a chocolate bar) and you have to wait 20 minutes for someone to get the hell out of your way, you'd be reaching for your baka fan too. |
| Xeoman Posts: 9281/11757 |
That sounds hilarious Kat... lol.
Man I wish I could recall some of the stupid stuff people did at Jiffy Lube, surely we had cases everyday. I do remember a lot of people would go up there to dump off their oil, or worse other fluids like radiator fluid or something (no offense if you guys do that haha), I mean... you think Jiffy Lube is the trashbin for that stuff? I guess it makes sense to an extent and it's silly to complain about, but yeah. We always had giant oil trucks come once a week that would absorb all the oil and fluids we had drained from vehicles. The oil doesn't stay with Jiffy Lube or magically disappear there, and from what I know there ARE real places where you're supposed to dump that stuff off at. |
| Cteno Posts: 2194/3416 |
Some people, y'know? I want a 3DS myself and though I fantasize about jacking one all of the time, I would never actually consider it. Then again, I would love to rob a bank one day and give all of the money to the less fortunate, just to give a huge middle finger to "The Man"! XD |
| Katana Posts: 3215/3649 |
That's ALWAYS the best to witness. Some big dumbass getting his ass kicked by the smaller dude.
And no, theft is NOT good. It's just...dude...he had a 100% chance of getting caught...I'm STILL replaying the incident over and over in my mind, and...now I can't stop laughing. |
| Cteno Posts: 2187/3416 |
Theft is never a good idea...
I like to watch videos of people thinking that they're tough shit, picking on somebody smaller than them, not knowing that they're a 5th degree blackbelt in Kenpo... and suddenly the little guy goes Fist of the North Star on their asses, dropping them to the ground with plenty of witnesses and somebody conveniently capturing the heartwarming event on film! |
| Katana Posts: 3210/3649 |
Anyone else take uber amounts of pleasure in witnessing this phenomenon?
Especially when they fall off a bike or something, and don't actually get hurt, or hurt badly. I have a "dumb criminal of the day" sort of situation at my work, actually, that most definitely fits the bill...although NOT very funny at first. Basically some guy walked right up to my counter, behind it, shoved me out of the way, snagged a 3-DS and ran off. Kept appologizing the entire time actually, especially after shoving me. I was too surprised to even realize what was happening as it did. Well, the guy is a regular. Like, he has the discount card and we have ALL of his information. And a REALLY badass camera system. The guy is like, in his mid-twenties, so it's not like this was some little kid pulling this dumb shit off either. But anyway, I called the number listed, and his mom, whom I actually know outside of work, answers. I tell her what happened. Told her that if he brings the item back, and I will be checking the serial number, and that it's in the same EXACT condition it was in when taken, charger, everything, that the worst that would happen to him is that he would be banned from, pretty much every public place in the Tri-state area. Well, this guy screws up pretty badly, so I HAD to file the police report. But point is...we had ALL of his information! Everything except social seciurity number, pretty much. So why? O_o And then comes BACK to my store, WHILE the cops are there, and hands me a hundred bucks. Says it's to pay for it. I was like "Dude, these things are about 170 after tax...and I need the item first. But these nice men in blue will get it back for me, so keep your hundred dollars." Seriously. |
