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Dark Admin









Since: 03-20-12
From: The bowels of xgf

Since last post: 1434 days
Last activity: 1652 days
Posted on 05-04-12 07:13 PM Link | Quote
I have a story for you guys

>be 14
>best friend is a girl named Ashley Jackson
>have huge crush on her
>go over her house one day after school for project
>work on project for a while
>parents tell us they're going to the grocery store real quick
>noproblem.jpg
>Ashley throws down notebook
>ive been waiting for them to leave she says
>rips off my pants
>at this point i have a huge boner
>3 inches max
>starts guzzling on weiner
>pulls out her own weiner
>wat
>didnt u know i was a dude dark admin
>punch Ashley in face
>cum all over her/his blood
>parents come home
>ashely is crying
>mother is screaming at me
>tell her i didnt mean to make Ashley cry
>apologize a trillion times
>mother still screaming
>IM SORRY MISS JACKSON
>OOOOOOHHHH
>I M FOR REAL
>DIDNT MEAN TO MAKE YOUR DAUGHTER CRY
>I APOLOGIZE A TRILLION TIMES


mfw
Cteno

Super Shotgun
Moderator








Since: 01-11-05

Since last post: 178 days
Last activity: 35 days
Posted on 05-04-12 10:45 PM Link | Quote

>go to Gamestop
>try to preorder Call of Duty: Black Ops
>wait in line for multiple hours behind fat kids and weeaboos
>some thirty-odd-year-old is hassling the clerk about BlazBlue
>finally leaves
>drink my questionably motherfucking hot coffee
>wonder if it's actually motherfucking cold
>weeaboos are speaking broken Japanese
>yell out IT'S LIKE I'M REALLY IN A JAPANESE PRESCHOOL
>see a python in the corner
>you don't see snake
>start thinking with portals
>eventually get to the front of the line
>clerk is a GRRRRL gamer
>she wants to fuck
>she acts all "kawaii" and says "Uguu~" and "Desu~"
>tells me that only low-life virgins play Call of Duty, and that Halo is the best FPS ever
>I disagree
>she says Halo invented FPS
>I laugh and disprove her
>she says that Halo was the first shooting game, and that it invented plasma rifles and planes with weapons
>I call her an idiot
>she calls me a noob
>ask for Battletoads
>she questions the girth of my penis
>ask if she's got Belts and Zippers XIII
>she calls me a garden gnome
>I pay for the games
>she calls me a loser
>she still wants to fuck
>realise that Ondore is lying
>I take the game with my bear hands
>suddenly, she screams
>I scream
>the fat weeaboos scream
>I'm a bear
>she's a bear
>we're all bears
>she opens the door
>cops run in and yell 'get on the floor!'
>everybody walk the dinosaur
>realise I have to go back to potatos to get my fucking power wrist

FUCKING GAMESTOP


(Last edited by Nelrith on 05-04-12 10:45 PM)
Phoenixocracy

The one true Xeodent








Since: 01-08-10
From: Xeomerica

Since last post: 881 days
Last activity: 878 days
Posted on 05-08-12 11:12 AM Link | Quote
Are...are we 4chan now?
Cteno

Super Shotgun
Moderator








Since: 01-11-05

Since last post: 178 days
Last activity: 35 days
Posted on 05-08-12 09:11 PM Link | Quote
Originally posted by Phoenixocracy
Are...are we 4chan now?

>Implying we weren't always 4chan



(Last edited by Nelrith on 05-08-12 09:11 PM)
True Flight

The One








Since: 08-21-04

Since last post: 435 days
Last activity: 420 days
Posted on 05-09-12 02:19 PM Link | Quote
classy
Bitmap

#1 Enhancement Shaman US Ravenholdt








Since: 09-05-04
From: His Laughin' Place

Since last post: 2090 days
Last activity: 2084 days
Posted on 05-09-12 03:58 PM Link | Quote
shut the fuck up
True Flight

The One








Since: 08-21-04

Since last post: 435 days
Last activity: 420 days
Posted on 05-09-12 04:54 PM Link | Quote
dammit my condescending wonka was broken.


(Last edited by Sorcha Rohan on 05-09-12 05:06 PM)
Xeoman

Wallmaster
Administrator








Since: 08-14-04
From: 255

Since last post: 12 days
Last activity: 9 days
Posted on 05-09-12 10:07 PM Link | Quote
shitty dick nipples
Dark Admin









Since: 03-20-12
From: The bowels of xgf

Since last post: 1434 days
Last activity: 1652 days
Posted on 05-10-12 06:43 PM Link | Quote
Originally posted by Bitmap
shut the fuck up


im all out of fucks to shut up! lemme run to the convenience store real quick, brb

did you want some shitty dick nipples while i was there, X?
Bitmap

#1 Enhancement Shaman US Ravenholdt








Since: 09-05-04
From: His Laughin' Place

Since last post: 2090 days
Last activity: 2084 days
Posted on 05-11-12 12:52 AM Link | Quote
this thread stinks

*farttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt*
Cteno

Super Shotgun
Moderator








Since: 01-11-05

Since last post: 178 days
Last activity: 35 days
Posted on 05-11-12 04:40 PM Link | Quote
I actually don't even really like 4chan.

>implying that he doesn't still love greentext
Elara

Divine Mamkute
Dark Elf Goddess
Chaos Imp
Penguins Fan

Ms. Invisable








Since: 08-15-04
From: Ferelden

Since last post: 20 days
Last activity: 20 days
Posted on 05-15-12 06:51 PM Link | Quote
... I have absolutely no idea what the fuck is going on.
Phoenixocracy

The one true Xeodent








Since: 01-08-10
From: Xeomerica

Since last post: 881 days
Last activity: 878 days
Posted on 05-21-12 11:56 AM Link | Quote
I've read greentext stories, and they are funny...but I'm not sure if I can even do one properly.
Xeoman

Wallmaster
Administrator








Since: 08-14-04
From: 255

Since last post: 12 days
Last activity: 9 days
Posted on 05-21-12 12:25 PM Link | Quote
At least you admit your weakness.
Pro_Master

Octorok
Banned








Since: 04-09-12
From: Soviet Controlled USA

Since last post: 2056 days
Last activity: 2055 days
Posted on 06-05-12 10:02 PM Link | Quote
Originally posted by Elara
... I have absolutely no idea what the fuck is going on.


It's a game where you post funny stuff in green text.You post each event in green like this

He gets up and goes to Wal*Mart.

Gets arrested for stealing zuchinni brussel sprouts and corn on the cob.

police officer likes the stuff he stole.The guy leaves well the officer goes to checkout.

Police officer gets reciept saying this

Fuck*You

Items sold Fuck you

1.Fuck You
2.F*** You
3.F*** You

Thamk you for shopping Fuck*You


Police officer tell cashyeir of problem

Cashyeir says Ugh not my problem

Police officer sues himself

Police officer kills himselfs

Dead Police officer talks to police




(Last edited by Pro_Master on 06-05-12 10:07 PM)
Elara

Divine Mamkute
Dark Elf Goddess
Chaos Imp
Penguins Fan

Ms. Invisable








Since: 08-15-04
From: Ferelden

Since last post: 20 days
Last activity: 20 days
Posted on 06-05-12 10:11 PM Link | Quote
I get the green text story part. What I meant was...

... Nevermind.
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